Views From My Car

Recently seen in my car. My car went over 30,000 miles on Tuesday ... still going strong. Then when I got home on Wednesday this little guy jumped onto my windshield.

Half a Cubic Yard

I got out today into the jungle that is my front yard and made some tall grass short... some very tall grass. In fact it was so tall that I decided to do something I haven't yet done at this house. Bag my grass clippings. Basically every two trips up and down the yard I had to empty it out. After some calculations and assumptions about how full the bag got, I figured out that I probably got about 16 cubic feet worth of grass clippings ... just my front yard in just eight days.

That's a lot of carbon pulled out of the atmosphere, so don't say I haven't done my part to prevent global warming.

So Gross I Had To Finish It

I got my haircut this week. While I was at the counter paying for it, I grabbed a piece of taffy out of the candy jar there. It was half cocoa brown, and half bright green... mmm chocolate mint!

Chomp chomp... "what the *censored* is this?"

My hairstylist says "oh, it's green apple caramel, you know like a caramel apple."

One of my coworkers said that it tasted so bad because I was expecting chocalate mint, but I thought it was just plain horrible... so bad in fact I had to finish it. It was like a car wreck, I couldn't look away. Yuck.

14 hours of funk

Venche's cup shares it's thoughts at 1:51am.

As I have posted before, one of the things I love about gatherings at Spanky & Mae's is the sheer randomness of the event. I got there about 2:45 and left just about 5:00, that's PM and AM respectively. We did some last minute set up, and started eating. This particular party was a little different. I spent probably six hours of it dancing, and another two of it playing frisbee. I didn't eat as as much as I usually do. There were some strange goings on during the course of the night, none of which I will share because I did not participate... unlike certain past parties...

cut to flashback *cue the eerie music*

back to normal *cue the regular soundtrack*

So anyways. great food, friends, and a good time.

There isn't as much visual evidence of the party as you might think, my first four pictures were really bad, so it became a challenge to get bad pictures of everyone. Here are a few I can share.

Cowhat Jamborama (I take no credit for this photo, Venche took it herself)


I have a theory that ReportWriter can frown, it's never been substantiated.


JUST like Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Grey...


I do not like green eggs and ham, I do not like them, Sam I am.


We discovered what song you sing at 4am ... the last one you heard!

Hopefully someone else took more pictures and will post them.

P.S. Hugh and Jenny ... wait until I find that undelete button again!

IQ test - by OnionBoy

There have been a spate of personality tests showing on my usual circuit of blogs, so I have decided to produce my own IQ test. Answer each question honestly, if no answer appears correct, choose the one that most closely matches what you are wearing. Scoring is at the end, please post your score at the end with your name, or if you are too embarrassed, post it with the name of someone you don't like. The test is not timed, but if it takes longer than 20 minutes for you to complete, go and carefully pour yourself another glass of whatever it is you are drinking and subtract one point at the end for each minute in excess of twenty you take.

1) if the square root of -1 is an imaginary number, then pi is equal to:
a. 3.1417blahblahblah
b. d/2r
c. 22/7ish
d. cherry

2) you are asleep in your bed at 2am and the phone rings, your reaction is:
a. why is work calling me AGAIN!
b. yeah baby!
c. not ANOTHER booty call.
d. commissioner gordon must need my help

3) on a typical saturday night you:
a. catch up on sleep you missed during the week
b. hang out with friends in a bar and hope to get some digits
c. have a nice dinner, dancing, and ...
d. you would like to answer, but you can't recall what you've done for the last 15 saturdays

4) you are home alone, you are probably:
a. fully dressed.
b. wandering around in your pj's or undies.
c. hanging out with the windows open in your birthday suit.
d. looking for any piece of clothing that doesn't smell too bad.

5) you are having toaster strudel, with the frosting you:
a. carefully and evenly spread it with a knife
b. make smiley faces and 'swear' words like *%#^*
c. you recreate Van Gogh's 'Sunflowers' on one and Wood's "American Gothic on the other.
d. you squirt it at random, and then swear you see the Virgin Mary, and try to sell it on eBay.

6) you hear a juicy new conspiracy theory about the war against terrorism, your reaction is:
a. you scoff, our president is doing a fine job.
b. you consider it carefully, trying to look for a connection to Rasputin's writings.
c. conspiracy theory? those people do whatever they want right in front of us without regard for the law.
d. is Reagan still the president?

7) a friend is in the hospital, you:
a. send a hand-written card and flowers, they don't want to be bothered with visitors.
b. go up and visit with flowers and gossip about your friends.
c. show up with contraband candy and sit quietly and listen to their thoughts and fears.
d. find out about it three weeks later from your mom.

8) your most common English usage error is:
a. to, too, and two, they all sound alike, who can keep track?
b. irregardless of what you might think, I pride myself on making no mistakes.
c. flammable and inflammable ... what's up with that?
d. irony and ironing.

9) day is to calendar as wheel is to:
a. I don't get it.
b. Buddhism.
c. Car? Who makes this stuff up?
d. Pizza

10) your friend is having a birthday, you get them:
a. a petrified piece of toaster strudel with an image of the Virgin Mary you found on eBay.
b. a gift card from their favorite store.
c. an indulgence that they wouldn't buy for themselves, like a bottle of expensive liqueur.
d. bail money.

------

Scoring:
Give yourself the following number of points for each answer:
8 points for each 'a'
12 points for each 'b'
16 points for each 'c'
4 points for each 'd'
and add it up, we'll wait for you to get a calculator

see below for your total:

145 and up: you are a genius! you are smart, funny, and gosh darn it, people like you.
119-144: you are above average, your main feature is using your brain too much, shut it off and don't over-think everything.
81-118: you are average, you are almost smart, almost funny, and gosh darn it, people almost like you.
80: if you got exactly 80, man do you need a life.
79 and below: you're not too bright, but people want to party with you.