17 December 2007

The Call - an oddball post

I heard The Call again yesterday. The Call is a sound that I hear in between sleep and waking. It is not an earthly noise, so it is difficult to describe. The closest I can come to describing what it sounds like is that of a stationary train signaling with it's horn, but it's more complicated than that.

There is a message in The Call, a call to come home. When I hear the sound, I am filled with a longing, like a dog missing its pack, and hearing it in the distance, I want to run wildly towards the noise to meet up with those I am missing. The feeling is intense and lingers, leaving me feeling off all day, sometimes several days ... like I have misplaced something important, but not only cannot figure out where I left it, but I cannot remember what it is I lost.

I have no gift for interpretation, so I don't know what it means. Can it be a metaphor? An angel speaking? Or something that is intentionally uninterpretable ... perhaps to get my mind working in a certain direction, or away from a different one.

It is like a deja vu for something that hasn't happened yet. That feeling that someone is just about to call you, but doesn't. A flickering motion you see out of the corner of your eye. That smell that reminds you of something you just can't place. Part of what makes it so darn difficult to describe is it's very nature, it's not worldly, I have no way to compare it, nor can I "replay" the sound in my own head.

The Call comes a couple times a year. I will hear it again, someday when I am ready, I will follow it home.

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