03 February 2007

To love is to serve

When I got into church on the last Sunday in January, I was delighted to see that the New Testament reading for the day was 1 Corinthians 13, a.k.a. faith, hope, and love. I thought to myself "cool, something I know and like, this should be relaxing..." The chortling I heard must have been God laughing at this thought and saying "not so fast, my friend."

The readings were read and Father Mark got up to talk, after the obligatory joke, the first words out of his mouth were "to love is to serve..." and of course (as priests like to do) he repeated it right away to make a point. "Oh crap!" I thought to my self, and I started to slide down the pew to avoid the lightening bolt that was heading my way. It was one of those times when I couldn't miss the message, there had been a little prep work done to open my mind (thanks justsmilechild) to what was said, but certainly I was not quite prepared for slap upside my head I got from those five words.

The following isn't news, one my biggest "faults" is being in love with myself and my spiritual gifts... i.e. taking pride in what I have been given rather than being humble that God has chosen to bless me with His gifts. Keeping a healthy self-esteem without tripping over the "you went to far" line is a struggle for me.

In hearing "to love is to serve..." I realized how I had been making too many of my relationships about me instead of serving the people I love, in particular my romantic interests. Maybe it's not because I'm so picky, i'm attracted to the wrong women (or not attracted to the right women), or I'm a poor communicator that I don't have anyone now, maybe it is because it has continued to be about me more than it really needed to be.

No surprise, but I've been provided with another growth opportunity, here's to growing into the shoes God wants me to wear.

editors note: this has been posted on the date it was written.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

thank you for sharing this. it takes a lot of courage to share your growths, and more particularly your faults, with your loved ones. i pray this lesson will be easier rather than harder for you to learn.